Editor’s Note: This article is part of Peak, The Athletic’s section focusing on leadership, personal development, and performance through the lens of sports. Follow Peak here.
The Nightmare at Monterey Peninsula
With three swings and three missed hits, my club consistently sliced through the thick kikuyu grass without making contact with the ball. My stance resembled that of a young child hitting off a tee, while my Titleist ProV1x sat awkwardly on a difficult side-hill lie. I started to doubt whether I could even succeed at this task.
A Humbling Experience
After my third unsuccessful attempt, I opted for an unplayable drop. This marked my seventh shot, yet I still faced 140 yards to the 18th green at the Monterey Peninsula Country Club. Our walking scorer, Barbara, kept me accountable. This was the unfortunate start to my experience as a 26-year-old former Division III golfer now working as a golf writer for The Athletic. I ended up scoring a 12 on this hole— a septuple bogey—during the prestigious U.S. Women’s Mid-Amateur, where the winner earns a spot in the U.S. Women’s Open.
Reflections on Performance
The incident was mortifying yet enlightening. After walking about 50 yards to take my drop, I felt completely numb in my arms. Hitting my seventh shot from the fairway led to yet another disastrous lie right by the edge of a bunker. I struggled to escape the sand and ultimately two-putted from 35 feet for a 12, which felt oddly satisfying given the circumstances.
Aimed for a Major Goal
At the start of the year, I committed to qualifying for the U.S. Women’s Mid-Am, targeting amateur female golfers aged 25 and over. I entered a local qualifying event in Alpine, N.J., without having competed in a major tournament since my sophomore year due to the pandemic. From 30 competitors at the event, I overcame a shaky start to finish with an even-par 72 in the rain, earning co-medalist honors and qualifying for the national championship at The Dunes Course.
Facing Elite Competition
The U.S. Women’s Mid-Am featured a field of 132 players. After two days of stroke play, only the top 64 would advance to the match-play rounds. I flew to California, played two practice rounds, and although the atmosphere at Monterey Peninsula was impressive, I didn’t make the cut.
Lessons Learned
Tournament golf is a crucible; I quickly learned how easily panic can set in. Yet, I chose to focus on the experience, knowing I had nothing to lose. Despite feeling immense pressure, I reminded myself that it was just a few rounds of golf next to the ocean with my brother as my caddie. Unexpectedly, those rounds tested my mental fortitude and self-confidence, shedding light on the challenges elite golfers face weekly.
A Glimmer of Hope
Following my high score, I managed to calm myself and made three consecutive pars. Waking up the next morning, I saw the opportunity to redeem myself and finished with a score of 1-over-par on the back nine, even after an embarrassing mistake on the fifth hole. With a total of 88-79 and having beaten about 10 players, I departed feeling lighter, already anticipating next year’s qualifier and the challenges that come with it.
