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<p><span class="sc-573fa0e8-7 gqeTMs">Alex Taylor</span><span data-testid="byline-contributors-contributor-0-role-location" class="sc-573fa0e8-8 bIfajQ">BBC News Reporter</span></p>
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<span class="sc-5340b511-2 jVqbAn">Ryan Libbey</span>
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<p class="sc-536eff7b-0 gnQokQ">Ryan believes that becoming a father has helped him understand himself better</p>
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<p><b id="survival-mode">"For a year, I was simply in survival mode."</b></p>
<p>Ryan Libbey, a former star of <i>Made In Chelsea</i>, was prepared for fatherhood.</p>
<p>However, he soon realized that reality was much different from his expectations.</p>
<p>His partner Louise faced serious health issues during childbirth, requiring hospitalization. This sudden change caused Ryan to take on the dual role of caregiver for both Louise and their newborn son, Leo.</p>
<p>“I was responsible for everything—night duties, diaper changes, and walks; I was acting as both mom and dad,” Ryan shared with the BBC.</p>
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<p>After almost a year, Ryan reached his breaking point. It took a conversation with his dad on a park bench for him to realize he needed support.</p>
<p>His father's words, “You’re not doing well. You need help. How can I assist you?” encouraged Ryan to open up and seek assistance.</p>
<p>His experience reflects a common yet rarely discussed struggle; while the conversation around mothers and postnatal depression is growing, the challenges fathers face are still largely overlooked.</p>
<p>According to a recent report from the government on men’s health, 5-15% of fathers experience anxiety during and after parenthood, with 5-10% facing depression.</p>
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<h2>Asking for Help is Not Weakness</h2>
<p>Ryan believes that his difficulties highlight a broader issue among men who often suppress emotions due to toxic masculinity.</p>
<p>Many men feel pressured to be resilient, claiming they must endure regardless of challenges.</p>
<p>“Asking for help doesn’t equate to weakness. I wish I had done it sooner,” he acknowledged.</p>
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<p>Dr. Jill Domoney, a psychologist focusing on mental health related to childbirth, emphasizes that men often hesitate to admit they’re struggling.</p>
<p>They may feel they aren’t entitled to seek help, especially in relation to mothers and babies, but their mental health is equally crucial.</p>
<p>After opening up to Louise, Ryan recognized his need to connect with her emotionally, realizing he had overlooked her desires for intimacy and communication.</p>
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<h2>Redefining Fatherhood</h2>
<p>This insight transformed Ryan's perspective on fatherhood.</p>
<p>He now writes letters to Leo, sharing his experiences with the hope that they will help his son understand emotional language and his parenting choices as he matures.</p>
<p>Similarly, Stephen Manderson, known as Professor Green, relates to this experience, having felt the importance of "self-parenting" since becoming a father to his son Slimane.</p>
<p>Stephen’s own childhood was marked by sporadic male guidance, leading him to make poor choices in managing his emotions through unhealthy coping mechanisms.</p>
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<h2>Practical Tips for New Dads</h2>
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<li>Talk about your feelings - Share what you're going through with someone you trust, whether it's a friend, partner, or a professional.</li>
<li>Keep up with hobbies - Continue engaging in activities that helped you feel like yourself before fatherhood.</li>
<li>Take care of your physical health - Nourish your body with good food, exercise, and get adequate sleep.</li>
<li>Connect with other fathers - Hearing their stories can help normalize your experiences.</li>
<li>Understand that asking for help is not a sign of failure - Prioritizing your well-being ultimately benefits your family.</li>
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<p>In the wake of his father's suicide, Stephen faced significant grief, particularly as they had been estranged for years.</p>
<p>Now, as a father, he is committed to breaking the cycle of emotional distance with his son, providing the security and guidance he lacked.</p>
<p>When emotions arise, they practice coping techniques together, fostering a safe space for expression.</p>
<p>Both Ryan and Stephen assert that confronting their struggles has made them healthier individuals, as they learned to express themselves effectively for their children.</p>
<p>“I’m getting better at processing emotions,” reflects Stephen.</p>
<p>“I recently wrote to Leo that parenting is a conversation; I’m learning just as much as you are,” Ryan added.</p>
<p><i>If you or someone you know is experiencing mental health challenges, please visit <a href="https://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/articles/4WLs5NlwrySXJR2n8Snszdg/information-and-support-suicide-feelings-of-despair">BBC Action Line</a> for resources.</i></p>
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</div>This version keeps the core information while paraphrasing and restructuring the content into seven paragraphs with appropriate headings.
